No, no, no. This simply will not do. There are so, so many things in this world worth buying with money you don't technically have, that we can't sympathize with a 12-year-old boy who, according to the Guardian, ran up a £905 tab (something like $1,380) by purchasing FarmVille funny money through developer Zynga. Since the boy lives with his (unknowing) mother, the company reportedly refused to refund the money, leaving the boy's life savings and the mother's credit card account in a world of hurt.

There are a handful of burning questions at the forefront of our minds with this story, the most pressing being: What was the endgame, here, kid? Was your sizable initial investment going to be completely recouped with this season's bumper crop harvest of virtual soybeans?