Reviews for Quantic Dream's Beyond: Two Souls appear to have been delicately placed on a lazy susan and then spun by the force of a truck slamming into the table. We haven't seen scattershot like this since the last time we fed caviar to a baby. Our review used the term "face full of ghost farts" in it, so let's see what delicate words were used by others.

• Gamespot (90/100): "Top-notch acting makes the characters you interact with sound believable ... Beyond: Two Souls so easily melds story and mechanics that you become enamored with this young woman and her extraordinary life."
• Polygon (80/100): "While it's exhilarating to see a team that has worked so hard to perfect a new way of telling stories, I couldn't help wishing they had a perfect one to tell."
• Giant Bomb (3/5): "Maybe there is no simple yes/no recommendation to give this game. For every part of it that comes together almost perfectly, there's another that's stricken by needless cliche or undercooked gameplay."
• Edge (50/100): "... this is a game almost entirely bereft of tension, one in which failure goes largely unpunished and is almost always inconsequential. There is emotion here, but it's felt passively, as spectator instead of player."
• VideoGamer (40/100): "There are bright moments, but when a game sells itself on a story, said story better be good. This one isn't, and anyone expecting Heavy Rain 2 is going to be sorely disappointed."

[Image: 5432action via Shutterstock]